Don't ever take things for granted ;

Your smile.

I slept at 1plus yesterday night. how great. I'm feeling so freaking tired now but I dont know whether later I can get to sleep anot. 4hours of sleep is seriously so not enough for me. sigh... I hope this wouldnt happen every night if not I will go crazy. well, had Science Practical today. and I dont understand the question! Physics was okae but I've drawn the graph wrongly, supposed to draw a curve but I drawn a straight line. Laugh at me! LOLS. Chemistry was shit. shall not elaborate. hahah. after Practical, was being held in the Basement till around 1pm. after that, slack outside General Office with Hweehan, Karmen and Nancy. look through the chinese Newspaper as Mrs Oh mention something like a sec5 girl who is short with short hair was caught sitting with legs wide open on a Ite guy's lap at Compass and it was printed on Newspaper? we were like uh, how can that be, when almost all the sec5 girls are with long hair. and those short hair are mostly tall. LOLS. so, we were feeling kinda unreasonable, any girl from Yuying can say they are from sec5 and you would believe them when you dont know them right? argh. so chatted with Mdm Amprit[how do you spell it?] LOLS. &Mrs Lim.Foo. till around 2plus, went Basement with the 3 of them as Karmen&Nancy are involved in the teachers' day celebration tomorrow. so, the rehearsal ended around 6plus and bus-ed home with Hweehan.

No doubt,
I was shocked.
But you warmed my heart. (:

Walk away, Loved. 8:06:00 PM `

I never know.

yesterday, was trapped in school till around 3pm then bus-ed home. reach home, bath and prepare. left home around 5plus. meet up with Q at Pasir Ris Mrt station. going for Gillian's Bbq as her birthday is today. went Swensens to buy a Black Forest cake for Gillian. its cost $40. ohwell. then go buy mineral water then headed to Pasir Ris park where the Bbq is at. well, shall not elaborate. anyway, there's Gillian, Peixuan, Levi, Huimin, Jolin, Kenny[Jolin's bf], Leonard[Gillian's bf], Kokchong, Jose, Justin, Jabez, Engkeat, Allan and Yonghao. did I miss out anyone? I hope not. well, I cried because of an idiot saying something so awful. not infront of them but when I'm on my way home. well, sigh... anyway, I'm home around 11pm last night. and its just so difficult for me to get to sleep.

Happy Birthday My Dearest Gillian! (:

Besties. without Queenie&Rina.

ohwell, today. had Chemistry&Physics Mcqs and Chemistry. Mcqs was infact manageable. but I guess I got a few careless mistakes? hahah. but Chemistry paper was a killer please. almost the whole paper I do not know how to do. I'm gonna be like so dead. Mrs Ng is so gonna kill me I guess. sigh... well, after exams around 11plus? headed Heartland with Nancy, Hweehan, Karmen and Chrystal. went Pizza Hut for lunch. I'm like freaking broke now. sigh... headed home around 2pm. was trying to take a nap at around 3pm. cause I havent been sleeping well for the last few days. but guess what, I've been tossing and turning around and I only sleep at around 4plus5pm? how great. two bloody hours. and I woke up at around 7pm? my whole body is aching, I'm having a headache due to not having enough sleep. and I guess I will be running a fever soon as I was caught in the rain for like twice yesterday. and I've been sneezing and sneezing.

tomorrow, Science Practical. but so damn fcuk lah. my slot is from 8am till around 930am. and the shit thing is we have to stay all the way till 1.30pm! regardless how early our Practical end. that will be like 4bloody hours at the basement. what can we do there man. walao. and basement is a place where my reception will go dead. how great is the school. argh!

I had already let my ego down.
I never know your love for me is so weak.
If your heart is not in it anymore,
I would walk away.
The choice lies on you.

Walk away, Loved. 7:30:00 PM `

Come back, Wont you?

I woke up with goldfish eyes this morning and look really terrible. well, I couldnt get to sleep last night and yesh, I cried myself to bed. sigh.. dont ask me why, I just cant stop my mind from thinking of those things especially you. mayb you are much better off without me, I do not know. okae, fine. I'm weak. well, had Chinese Paper2 today. cant really concentrate therefore dont really understand the passage and so dont know how to answer the questions. my A~ ): well, its over. I dont care either. guess I'm gonna do badly for this prelim. its raining cats&dogs now. and I'm feeling sick.

If you dont miss me anymore,
Thats good for you.
But if you do,
Please let me know.
Imy.

_______________________________________________

This song tells everything.

the rain, just never seems to bring the joy,
I feel the same everlasting pain of my loss remains
my heart, can't seem to learn to part
the hold you left the mark
all that I dreamed of now it seems so stark
though I told myself won't hold my breath
a part of me was dying
there is nothing left for me to do now, but give in
if you gave me, one more chance to tell you how I was feeling
I would sing to you and tell you I won't live my life without you
if you gave me, one more chance to tell you how I was feeling
I would hold your hand and look in your eyes and ya know,
I'd never let you go
the way, you left me on the train
I don't know what to say
I remember everything on that day
I can't believe we'd never dance
I just need one more chance
to share the sunset our one last romance
though I told myself won't hold my breath
a part of me was dying
there is nothing left for me to do now, but give in
if you gave me, one more chance to tell you how I was feeling
I would sing to you and tell you I won't live my life without you
if you gave me, one more chance to tell you how I was feeling
I would hold your hand and look in your eyes and ya know,
I'd never let you go

Walk away, Loved. 4:18:00 PM `

No longer.

well, today started off weird. I cant explain, but the feeling is really weird. had eMaths paper2 today. overall, the paper wasnt difficult but I let go of 20marks or so. I dont even bother to crack my mind to think or rather I'm not in the mood to? shit please. sigh... and I spent the last 15mins or so staring into space, when I can actually use the "precious" time to at least check my work, but I didnt. how great can that be, there goes my A once again. and the hall is bloody freaking cold. argh! after exams, around 12pm. had lunch in Canteen then back to class with Nancy, Karmen and Hweehan. we played Chess/Psp again, when we are suppose to study Chemistry. how great uh. Nancy and Karmen went for their Drum practice around 3plus. left me and Hweehan in that eerie classroom once again. LOLS. well, we only settled down to study around 4pm? which is bad bad bad. did Chemistry TYS. and out of 20Mcqs, I only know like less than 10? LOLS. pathetic. around 5pm, the Uncle chase us out of the class so we went Canteen. eat, play Psp. LOLS. then awhile later, Mrs Ng walked pass. ohman, how great to see her. she saved my life. LOLS. ask her about those questions which I dont know how to do. Thankyou Mrs Ng. and she left around 6plus. then me and Hweehan headed home too. Hweehan keep saying that I'm not myself today. hahah. I'm like seriously not please.

I'm missing you.
When I know I shouldnt.
God, save me.
I cant concentrate in anything now.
My mind is full of why...
sigh...
I'm the useless one.
Forgive me, my weaknesses.

Walk away, Loved. 7:39:00 PM `

I hope not.

I've been wondering, pondering.
And I guess everything is coming to an end ~~soon,~~ right.
Though how much I pray it wouldnt.
But everything with a start, eventually will end.
It's me being selfish here.
It's me leaving everything hanging.
I'm sorry.
You have the choice to leave or to stay.
I wouldnt be selfish anymore.
At least I know, you loved me ~~once.~~
You have been really great all this while.
I really thankyou.
But I'm the useless one who cant make a simple decision.
I'm so sorry.
I'm in a dilemma.
And I also know, mayb after you leave,
I might not find anyone who can love me like you do.
But I know you are tired.
And ~~I am too.~~
I'm tired of receiving lesser and lesser messages each day.
I'm tired of receiving shorter and shorter messages each time.
I'm tired of the lesser and lesser time you have for me.
Yesh, I'm a demanding person.
So, it's unfair for you to wait for me.
And I'm sure there's someone out there who is more worthy your love,
And perhaps ~~not me anymore.~~
If you are really gonna leave,
I'm sure it's for the better.
and mayb, its wrong for you to fall for me in the first place.
Like what I say, I'm not a good girl,
Not to say a good girlfriend.
For that, I apologize.

Walk away, Loved. 3:57:00 PM `

Say you remember.

woke up at around 11plus today. meet up with Hweehan around 1plus then went to take bus to Compass. meet up with Karmen, Nancy and Chrystal. went Foodcourt to have my breakfast/lunch. all of us were like super full after that. hahah. then went to Starbucks to study. but I guess we spent most of the time chatting about our personal problems? hahah. thats so so so bad. wish me all the best for my Chemistry paper man. LOLS. studied till around 7pm, went to look for Peixuan Mummy. walk around awhile then all left Compass, going separate ways. hahah. Hweehan and I took bus80 home. but I dont wanna go home so early. so went to her house there derh Hawker to have dinner. then around 9plus, walked home.

and lastly, Happy 16th Birthday Zhichao! (:

Walk away, Loved. 10:40:00 PM `

Further and further.

We seems Drifting Apart.
I'm feeling kinda Lost.
How I wish I could Turn Back the Time.
Let me feel the Love Once Again.

I walk alone.

well, I only had one paper today which is Socialstudies. I'm so gonna flunk it please. hahah. the Chapters that I know, didnt come out. all those I never read before, came out. how shit right? but I should blame myself for not studying. but its humans! the subject I despise most. hahahah. well, after my paper, its around 10am. ate in school then headed home alone around 1030am as Bitches they all are having their Amaths/Poa paper. hahah. reached home, slack awhile, bath and stuffs. left home around 1245pm, went to take Mrt to Bukit Batok to meet up with Rachel to get my eyeliner. (: then meet up with Hweehan at Jurong East. how great she is right, to come all the way from Hougang. hahah. went to eat Long John then went to walk around at Imm. then around 4plus, went to take bus66 home and the trip back home is like super duper long, make me so damn sleepy. hahah.

Papers left:
eMaths Paper2.
Mother Tongue Paper2.
Science MCQ (Phy&Chem).
Chemistry.
Science Practical. (Phy&Chem).

Walk away, Loved. 8:49:00 PM `

Dont say you Love me.

I'm back! woohoo~ hahah. lets see, I shall blog from Tuesday then.

Tuesday, 21August.
had Prelim, Mother Tongue Paper1 and Geography.
both papers were okae. hopefully I could at least pass my Geography? hahah.

Wednesday, 22August.
had eMaths Paper1 and English Paper2.
pray hard that I dont make too many careless mistakes for my Maths paper. hahah. English, I just hope I could pass. the chances of passing is low okae, let Miss Lin be your teacher, and you will realise how lousy your English is. XD
had Olevel English Oral after school, and I think I did Badly. sigh... reading&conversation was alright. but the picture is shits please! argh~

Thursday, 23August.
had only Physics Paper. its kinda difficult uh. mayb not difficult, but just that I dont understand the question. well, I still pray for an A.

Walk away, Loved. 11:19:00 AM `

Exams Blue~

Prelim's tomorrow! how sad. school was as usual today. stayed back for Maths remedial today till aorund 330pm. then studied Geography till 6pm! but I dont think I will do well for Geography. its such a boring subject please! -.- nothing gets into my head I guess? hahah. but really thanks Karmen for teaching me. Appreciated alright! XD after studying, went Kovan's Kopitiam with Karmen and Hweehan. ate dinner there. like the first time having dinner with them on a school day at Kopitiam. LOLS. then reach home around 730pm I guess? well, I'm feeling kinda useless now. I have to score well for Prelims, shouldnt I? but I cant get myself to like study. save me please. thats so super shit.

tomorrow Chinese Paper1 and Geography~

Walk away, Loved. 9:45:00 PM `

Its just lingers around.

Secret! 不能说的•秘密
super nice! do go and catch it if you havent. those touching scenes still lingers in my mind. XD

Prelims is starting on Tuesday and I'm having my Olevel English Oral on Wednesday! how shit?! and I'm so not prepared for Prelims. I cant get myself to really sit down and hit on my books. sigh... what am I doing? so shit please.

Walk away, Loved. 8:37:00 PM `

Hold me close.

well, I'm supposed to wake up at 715am today as I need to reach school by 9am for Geography lesson. and I woke up at 750am which is like so freaking late! LOLS. but well, I still get to reach school on time. be proud of me! hahahah. combined with the sec4s and 5B. the lesson was alright. dont really know whats he's talking about anyway. and he's super against me. everything Meizhen Meizhen. argh! and I want go toilet, he dont allow, wth~ LOLS. and he let us go early! lesson ended around 11plus. headed Heartland with Hweehan and Mingyi, lunched at hawker. meet up with Huimin and gang, went to take a look at the Carnival at Kovan Hub. then Huimin they all left, went to look for Xumin and Cassandra with Hweehan then headed Mac. Karmen and Nancy joined us. did abit of Maths then around 3pm, went to the Carnival again, then walked around at Heartland and homesweethome at around 4pm. slept till 7pm. hahaha.

Walk away, Loved. 8:23:00 PM `

Secret.

well, school as usual. school ended around 1pm, slack awhile then headed home, reached home around 2pm. bath and stuffs, meet up with Hweehan at my house here around 3pm. then we headed to Ps. meet up with Kokchong and Nancy. as we are watching Secret at 440pm. overall, the movie is like so nice and touching. Nancy and I cried like nobody's business. LOLS. and its really worth watching. (: after movie, its around 645pm. Hongying came to meet us. Nancy and Hongying went Mos Burger for dinner while me, Hweehan and Kokchong went Pizza Hut for dinner. and the three of us were like super full after eating. till now, I'm still feeling kinda full. hahah. aftermath, went to walk around till around 9plus, me and Hweehan headed home while Kokchong went to look for Gilbert and gang.

tomorrow got Geography lesson. sians.

Walk away, Loved. 10:29:00 PM `

Sick.

I'm feeling sick now. irritating running nose again. gross! been sneezing and sneezing. ):

I miss them so.

Walk away, Loved. 9:09:00 PM `

I'm wrong from the start.

today started out ever so fine. in fact, better than expected. (: ohwell, but after that, everything is like so shit. PG lesson, stayed in the Hall for what-so-ever talks. and then back to the class for English lesson. Miss Lin Totally Pissed me off today and I almost quarrelled with her. we were outside the classroom waiting for Weijun to open the door. so Nancy was like telling me stuffs. so when the door is open, everyone got in, including Miss Lin. so when Nancy and I was about to step into the classroom, she walked over and say, "Okay, dont want come in right, then stay outside". and closed the door. Wtf~ and for that, Nancy and I was locked outside the class. I'm Seriously Pissed Off. what the fcuk I did wrong? she's just fcuking unreasonable can. she's always so fcuking against me and Nancy. arghhhhh! then half-way through her lesson while our classmates were doing work, she walked out of the class and talked to us. and at that moment, I'm reading Teenage Magazine. and Nancy was doing her English tuition homework. and so she was like saying "And Meizhen, at this time you can still read this kind of thing". because I was reading the Magazine instead of looking at her when she walked out to talk to us. then I replied her "My bag is inside the class". then she say "Oh, good. Put your bag inside then come out and stand". and I'm Pissed off and I looked into her eyes and say "I put my bag in the class before I went to the Hall this morning!". Wtf can. get the facts right before saying things that you doesnt know. then she was like saying we have no sense and whatever lah. dont even bother about what she say. wanna complain, Go Ahead. I'm in for it cause I'm so not in the wrong. and finally, her bloody two periods of English ended. went in the class and was telling Bitches how fcuking pissed off I am. I know she's a good teacher but she have serious moodswings! I dont wanna hate her but she makes me hate her! and went Toilet with Bitches, therefore, we are late for Chemistry lesson. Mrs Ng is kinda disappointed. I'm sorry my dear teacher. and this, I admit that I'm in the wrong so I went to say sorry to her again after her lesson end. if I'm at wrong, I will admit. but if I'm not, forget about me being nice to you. and the whole day went on shitty. all the teachers seems to be in bad mood? sigh... and well, after school headed Kfc with Hweehan, Cassandra and Xumin, eat, chat and stuffs. home around 4pm. slept till 7plus. hahah.

No matter what,
Kindly Cheerup.

Walk away, Loved. 8:25:00 PM `

The wild thoughts.

I'm so not feeling good now. I'm disappointed in myself, hell disappointed.

Firstly, my Olevel Chinese result is so super-duper disappointing. sigh...

Secondly, my English Paper1 is a gone-case. I Totally Wrote Out-Of-Point for the Compo.

Thirdly, I'm not selected for DPA.

ohgod, how shit can my day be? ): should I retake my Chinese? I Really Dont Know. Mdm Tan, my Sister, Nancy and all encourage me to, but I'm doubting myself. how shit. can anyone save me? and I did study today after school with Nancy, Hweehan, Karmen, Xumin and Cassandra in class till around 5plus. I should start bucking up, and I mean it.

I've been questioning myself.
and I cant believe that I teared again.
Yesh, I know She might be a better gurl than me.
But, am I so bad?
I'm Sorry.
I'm letting my mind goes wild again.
I should have let go,
Shouldnt I?
I should feel happy for you,
Shouldnt I?
But nevertheless,
I'm Really Glad that you are no longer avoiding me.
I'm Really Glad that you still trust me.
I'm Really Glad that we can be friends once again.
I'm Really Glad, Very Glad.
But yesh, I'm sorry once again.
~~I do still love you.~~
But I will wish you All The Best. (:
and the Most Important thing is Stay Happy Always.

Walk away, Loved. 8:38:00 PM `

You are that Perfect.

Tomorrow would be a shit day I guess. Olevel Mother Tongue Results would be released and Prelim2 will starts tomorrow. how shit can it be? and now, I'm starting to worry for my results. Olevel is in just 2months' time and I havent even start studying/revise my work. I will start tomorrow and I must start. argh! so shit shit shit.

you left me speechless.
nothing, but lost for words.
I never thought, I never know.

Walk away, Loved. 7:48:00 PM `

听说爱情回来过。

在朋友那儿听说
知心的你曾回来过
想请他替我向你问候
只为了怕见了说不出口
你对以往的感触还多不多
曾让我心碎的你
我依然深爱着
在朋友那儿听说
知心的你曾找过我
我要他帮我对你隐瞒
只是怕见了面会更难过
我对以往的感触还那么多
曾给我幸福的你
我依然深深爱着
Chorus:
有一种想见不敢见的伤痛
有一种爱还埋藏在我心中
我只能把你放在我的心中
这一种想见不能见的伤痛
让我对你的思念越来越浓
我却只能把你把你放在我心中
I love this part.
对你的声音你的影你的手
我发誓说我没有忘记过
而关于你选择了现在的他
我只能说我有些难过
我也真心真意的等过

wonderful song. (:

Walk away, Loved. 11:28:00 PM `

Within you and me.

woke up around 11plus yesterday. Meimei Dearie message me and ask me to go study together. I agreed so we meet at Bugis Mrt station around 240pm. went Long John for lunch first. then after that, went Street to walk awhile and headed Starbucks. and there were no good place so we ended up sitting under the hot sun and the both of us were sweating like some crazy pigs. LOLS. so we decided to go up to a dance studio where she will be having her rehearsal later in the night. she's reading Physics text and I've been doing Maths paper all the way till around 7pm. chatted stuffs and went window shopping. around 8pm, she went for her dance rehearsal and I headed Taka alone to meet up with Xumin they all as Luxue came back from England to visit us. when I reached, there's Xumin, Wudi, Luxue, Cassandra, Gilbert, Xihong, Gaofei and Antron. hahah. and I'm like so extra because they are eating Seoul Garden. but Xihong is great lah, he let me have his seat. (: and so around 9pm, we left Taka and walked to Cine. actually wanna play Pool but the queue is super duper long. LOLS. so Luxue suggested to go Kbox. but we were like so broke and she paid for us. arhhh~ I feel so bad cause I'm not so close to her and its like $31 per person. only gurls went for Kbox. guys went other place for Pool so well. the session was till 145am. but Cassandra, Xumin and me left around 12am. cause Cassandra's brother offered to send us home. ohyesh, Cassandra's Mum was with us too. and I cant stand her. LOLS. no offences Cassandra. XD I mean, yesh, I know how complicated the outside world is. its not as if its the first time I'm staying out late somemore 12am is not that late afterall. well, and I'm home around 1am. and now I'm feeling bored. might be going to my Godmum's house later in the evening. (:

pardon me for being emo. XD

Walk away, Loved. 1:51:00 PM `

National Day.

Bibi Lianiee. taken on Monday. (:

Peixuan Mummy.
they are Loves~

woke up at 3plus today. reached home at around 2am this morning. LOLS. still feeling kinda tired. XD yesterday after zero7, reached home, slack then around 7plus, prepared and left house around 845pm. and waited for the stupid bus80 for almost 40mins. at 930pm then the bus come, when I'm supposed to meet Peixuan Mummy 930pm at Compass. sorry Mummy make you wait for so long. reached Compass around 10pm. then cabbed down to Serangoon Garden with Mummy. walked to the Pub where Queenie's Birthday celebration is held. Levi, Andre and his friend Alex was there. saw Alex and Xiaoyong they all there. awhile later, Gillian, Jolin and Huimin reached. sit down in the room chatted and sing songs. hahah. its been a long time since I last saw each and every one of them. after awhile, Andre and his friend left. then Justin and his Girlfriend Joanna joined us. then around 12am, cut cake and sang birthday song for Queenie. she look extremely beautiful yesterday. (: Engkeat joined us awhile later. then around 1am, left the Pub with Mummy, Jolin and Engkeat. Gillian meet up with her boyfriend Leonard. its the first time I see him also. hahah. they look loving which is good. (: went ChompChomp, Engkeat eat then after that, cabbed home. I love my Besties always.

Happy 18th Birthday Queenie. I love you always! Hugs.
and Happy 42th Birthday Singapore!

Walk away, Loved. 4:10:00 PM `

Zero7.

went for the Annual Zero7 run. woke up at 530am as usual. bath and stuffs, meet up with Hweehan and her sister at her house there around 645am. then cabbed to Bishan Park. reach there around 7plus. then around 8plus, the whole event starts. well, everything was as usual. but this year got Tug-of-War. hahah. 5A&B against 3A&B&C. hahah. got three rounds and we won 2rounds! therefore we are the winner. wahahahah. so proud of them, and for your information, I didnt play cause I dont wanna hurt my hand. XD I'm just there shouting Pull for them. LOLS. that sounds retarded but who cares? hahah. and my class got Third for the NE rubbish collection thingy. and Second for the NE Banner. how great?! hahahah. wonderful class. XD and well, everything ended around 11am. sang Erinna a Birthday Song before we left the Park. hahaha. then headed Amk Hub with Nancy, Karmen, Hweehan and her sister. had our lunch at Foodcourt then around 12plus1pm, went to take bus, alone. hahahah. cause Hweehan and her sister took a cab home. so yah.

and once again, Happy 17th Birthday Twinne. I love you. Hugs.

I love the way we are now.
and I know, mayb this wouldnt lasts long.
I really enjoy and love your accompany.
I hope you do.
I'm sorry I couldnt give you an answer.
cause I'm just somehow trapped by myself.
I beg for your forgiveness.
I know I do hurt you in some way or another.
but I really dont mean it.
Time will heal all wounds.
and I hope when my wound is fully healed,
you are still there for me.
let all this continue.

Walk away, Loved. 4:11:00 PM `

Put me to sleep.

well, here to update on yesterday. hahah. school as usual, after school, went home bath and stuffs, meet up with Hweehan around 4pm at my house downstairs and went to take bus to Angmokio Hub. reach there around 445pm I guess. but Wudi they all still havent reach yet so we went to buy movie tickets first then went to look for Gillian as she's working there. (: they reached around 5pm, got Wudi, Cassandra, Xumin, Mingyi and Robin. hahah. he's the only guy. then Karmen was the last to reach. total: 8persons. hahah. we are watching Alone, which starts at 540pm. so chatted with Lianiee till around 530pm, went up to buy Popcorns and stuffs and in to the cinema. the movie is nice but very scary lah. LOLS. at some parts, I screamed like dont know what. XD but overall, its nice except for the sound effect. LOLS. around 730pm, the movie ended. went Kfc to have dinner. and pictures time~ XD then home around 9plus. Tired~

The Gurls. (:

Karmen, Hweehan, Xumin. (:

Hweehan.

Karmen, Mingyi. (:

Wudi. (:

Cassandra. (:

Robin. (:

and Ahgurl! XD

Walk away, Loved. 4:37:00 PM `